I cannot sleep. Every night when it's time to sleep, even when all are asleep, I cannot sleep. I toss and I turn. I change positions to get more comfortable. I lie on my back, still no sleep. I turn and lie on my right side, nope, no sleep.
I try my left side, still no sleep. It's frustrating, listening to the fan whirring away, ruining any chance of my sleeping. Blocking out the sound of the fan, no help. The Air Con comes alive to cool the temperature, adding to the already noisy environment. I just cannot sleep.
It doesn't help when thoughts are racing through my mind, one after the other. Catching one thought and burying it deep in my conscious, doesn't help as another comes flying. A memory I had not thought about in ages, flies out and catches me. Another one runs as a sub-current, waiting to arise. A still another thought is not so patient and comes tangentially, attacking me.
My mind is abuzz. The thoughts start to tumble over one another. It's like I am on some drug, which keeps me up, making me feel alive. The energy in my brain, makes me sensitive to the sound of the dog packs barking at an innocent prey, to the sound of the car carrying its passengers encossed inside in the false sense of safety.
I move out the room. Maybe all I need is a change of the room, a room with less sound. I don't switch on the fan, don't want it whirring and trying to talk to me. The new room comes with its challenges. It has the light coming from the neighbors home, which is adding to the white noise. A pillow on the eyes helps a little, but now I can hear the sounds from two other rooms, with the Air Con switching on and going into a gung-ho mode and the fan trying to outdo with the shir shir of its own. The cacophony is too much for me.
I return to the room.
I toss and I turn.
I cannot sleep.
I try my left side, still no sleep. It's frustrating, listening to the fan whirring away, ruining any chance of my sleeping. Blocking out the sound of the fan, no help. The Air Con comes alive to cool the temperature, adding to the already noisy environment. I just cannot sleep.
It doesn't help when thoughts are racing through my mind, one after the other. Catching one thought and burying it deep in my conscious, doesn't help as another comes flying. A memory I had not thought about in ages, flies out and catches me. Another one runs as a sub-current, waiting to arise. A still another thought is not so patient and comes tangentially, attacking me.
My mind is abuzz. The thoughts start to tumble over one another. It's like I am on some drug, which keeps me up, making me feel alive. The energy in my brain, makes me sensitive to the sound of the dog packs barking at an innocent prey, to the sound of the car carrying its passengers encossed inside in the false sense of safety.
I move out the room. Maybe all I need is a change of the room, a room with less sound. I don't switch on the fan, don't want it whirring and trying to talk to me. The new room comes with its challenges. It has the light coming from the neighbors home, which is adding to the white noise. A pillow on the eyes helps a little, but now I can hear the sounds from two other rooms, with the Air Con switching on and going into a gung-ho mode and the fan trying to outdo with the shir shir of its own. The cacophony is too much for me.
I return to the room.
I toss and I turn.
I cannot sleep.
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